Therapy Thursday

(This didn’t actually come as a Therapy Thursday, but as it came anonymously, I am treating it as such. Also, if you want to send us in a question or problem, go to the “Harass Us” page in the sidebar. You can put a fake email and name in there if you’re scared.)


Dear Birdman

You seem like a angry dick on your facebook. Why do you hate God so much? Why do you always try to find a reason to make fun of religion instead of just checking it out and maybe liking it. It’s pretty cool to have all of the people in your church there to back you up and they make you always feel like your a good person. Theirs alot of worse things in the world than loving God. You could be a rapist or murder people.

Love Life


Okay then. If I was an angry dick, I would start this out by correcting your grammar and calling you an inbred stump jumper. I would then tell you to go grab the old mare and give her a right good rogering.

But I’m not angry, so I won’t. The dick part, would I guess depend on who you talk to. I’m now going to respond to your questions, albeit briefly, because you sent me this at 9:55 on a Wednesday night and I have to get up at 5:30 tomorrow. Why not leave it for next week, you might ask? Well, I haven’t had a Therapy Thursday question in forever, and I kind of miss them (a lot).

I love Monty Python.

I love Monty Python.

#1. I don’t hate God, but I would if I thought he existed. He is one of the most cruel characters in fiction, and I wouldn’t want to live in a world where I had to fear what a bi-polar, omnipotent being was going to do to me if I screw up. I also don’t like the smell when I burn assorted animals at the altar.

#2. I make fun of religion because I find it funny. There are a myriad of reasons for this, but it’s mainly because of the hypocrisy. I have no problem with people loving whatever god they prefer, but when people, especially children, get raped, murdered, mutilated, and tortured in the name of God, I have a problem with that. I am not going into all of the reasons that I have issues with some religions, because there just isn’t enough time or patience.

#3. I’m glad that you get such a great feeling from going to church. I know a ton of people that feel the same way. I also know a few that aren’t welcome in the church anymore, because of “the way God made them”. I know that there are a lot of churches that allow anyone to worship there, and I really think that it’s cool. I don’t go to church, mainly because I don’t believe in God, nor do I want to be a hypocrite. I’ll tell you the truth, the bible makes me very upset. If I could find a church that didn’t read from a bible-like object or sing hymns, I would check it out for sure. I’m all for the peace and love, I’m just not such a fan of the fire and brimstone.

Stop averting your eyes.

Stop averting your eyes.

#4. Yes, there are way worse things than loving God, but for me there are way better ways. One of them is loving my friends and family unconditionally and unbiased. I don’t want some archaic deity telling me who I can and can’t love, or why I shouldn’t love them. That’s none of his/her/it’s business. I also don’t agree with 90% of what “God” supposedly said or did, so if I was choosing someone to love, that wouldn’t even be an option. As for being a rapist or a murderer, I’ll point you in this direction. That link will show you a few things that you may not have known about your god and his correlation with rape and murder.

Imagine there’s no Heaven, it’s easy if you try. No hell below us, above us only sky,


P.S. Stay the fuck off of my page if you don’t like what my admins or I put on there. It’s just common fucking sense that if you don’t like something, or you find it offensive, you go to Pinterest. Like seriously, how hard is it to just keep your trap shut and move on? I’m not going to religious websites and forums to tell them how awesome agnosticism is and how they should try it, so why bother doing that with me?


Dear Judgey McJudgerson,

I’m glad you have faith. I honestly am glad for you. I know what it’s like to be so sure about something that you would risk having perfect strangers tell you that you are crazy rather than accept that what you know is wrong. I’m thinking, if you temper that faith with a bit of love and understanding, you’ll realize that what other people find funny is not going to get them sent to hell. However, if they do in fact GET sent to hell, then it will have been their own fault and they knew the potential risks involved, regardless of their ridiculousness. In closing, stay off the page if you don’t like it. Why would you want to go to a place you despise, unless it is to judge the people who go there? If you are so religious and God-loving, you would realize that your saviour would be ashamed of you for sending that letter, especially in the cowardly way of an anonymous letter.

All my best in love and fairness,

Mrs. B

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