The Year I Got Drunk On Halloween

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I know, that’s every year.

Remember how Gadget and Penny have a Halloween party every year? Remember how we always take all kinds of pictures? Not so much this year. Luckily Mrs. Stick was there to snap a few gooders so we can at least have a post. Thanks Mrs. Stick!

Apparently X marks the spot. Start digging, ladies.

She’s the one with the boobs.

You see, I got so drunk last year that I left with only one shoe and had my head hanging out the door for most of the ride home. This year I was going to be way more smarter than that. I had devised a surefire plan to not get so sick.

I would just drink shots.

Genius, right?

Sure, I would have a beer in hand to nurse on, but for the most part I would just do shots. Mostly because the people there force you to drink them, but also because I’m one of those people. The forcers.

Just during the “meetings” though. If you aren’t in a meeting nobody will force you to drink anything. Well, they might try it upstairs, but there are places for you to run. Downstairs is a different story. The bar is right beside the stairwell, so as soon as you go down there, you can’t get back up without doing a shot of everything on the bar. These rules are enforced by Tweezle, Gadget, and everyone else in the basement and there is absolutely no breaking the rules.

Now this particular Halloween wasn’t a good one for planning, because I didn’t fly back until two days before the party. I looked like this,

Wolverine, right?

Wolverine, right?

and I was exhausted. I also had a lot of planning to do for the shavedown, so my mind was a little flighty. I was at Gadget’s place in the afternoon before the party and still hadn’t planned my costume.

Wolverine it is.

Can you see it now?

Can you see it now?

Except I didn’t have time to find a good Wolverine suit or leather jacket or claws, so I did what any lazy person would do in that situation. I gave up.

Wolverine style.

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Depression affects us all. I wish you could see my pyjama pants.

Can you guess who that pretty lady on my arm is?  I’ll give you a hint.

I wake up with her almost every morning.

Yes! It’s Mrs. Birdman. Here’s a fun picture of her and Gadget.

This is the start of the night.

This is the start of the night. I hope they don’t make babies.

We stayed upstairs long enough to see a few couples come in.

There was Hunter and The Rack. The guy in behind Hunter had the most incredible costume, and if anyone got some shots of it send them through. It was a working steampunk backpack with all kinds of robotics on it THAT HE MADE HIMSELF.

He also is known for his angling. Knows how to handle his rod, or so they tell me.

He also is known for his angling. They tell me he can handle his rod quite well.

I don't know why her head's cut off. Honest, honey.

I don’t know why her head’s cut off. Honest honey it’s the camera.

Tweezle, Firecracker, and an enigma were there.

I still don't know what he says. All I could get out of him was slurs against the Irish and vomit.

I still don’t know what he says. All I could get out of him was slurs against the Irish and vomit.

These two nerds were there.

I think the term is "Bazinga!!!"

I think the term is “Bazinga!!!”

The Witness Protection People (Those who can’t be shown) were there too, so let’s move on. Shall we?

That's gotta be Rizzo with her tongue hanging out like that.

That must be Frenchie with her tongue out like that.

I had all kinds of shots of Penny and the Queen, but they were mostly with the WPP, so I found one with just them.

The only picture where these two aren't with the WPP. I almost got electrocuted. Twice.

I almost got electrocuted. Twice.

That goes for Ginger and the Tooth Fairy too, so I’ll try to piece one together.

Pretty good job for someone as tired as I am.

Pretty good job for someone as tired as I am.

Juice and The Cleave were there, but because The Cleave’s chest is so formidable, her foot exploded from the sheer awesomeness. She was confined to sitting near the WPP with her crutches and I had to doctor a shot of them too.

She must be on Tramadol or heroin to be that smiley without booze.

She must be on Tramadol or heroin to be that smiley without booze.

I don't even know how I lucked out with this one.

I don’t even know how I lucked out with this one.

Downstairs there was a bit of fun going on as well.

So much fun. Hey, he has a camera phone.

So much fun. Everybody is happy.

Until the camera came out.

The sign says "NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY"

Look at the steampunk lashes. They kept the air circulating.

So I sat at the bar and attended meetings.

Remember when I said I was just going to sip a beer? I think I forgot that rule after the sixth meeting.

Remember when I said I was just going to sip a beer? I think I forgot that rule after the sixth meeting.

As you saw, Danica Patrick and the Earnhardt that is alive were there, as well as Chef Boyardee, and his elusive protegé. I was in good company if we needed someone to drunk drive our asses home really fast, or cook some mini raviolis. Either way we had that shit covered.

There were also some deep discussions about tweezling.

I like to tweezle the nubbin with a little salt.

I like to tweezle the nubbins with a little salt. it gives it that Je ne sais quoi.

Not my nubbins you don't

Not my nubbins you don’t. I will cut you where you pee.

Then there was a wardrobe malfunction. Probably not what you were hoping for.

WTF? Who invited Rip Taylor?

WTF? Who invited Rip Taylor?

I don’t remember when this happened, but it was on Facebook.

I don't think our tongues ever touched. He'd still be scraping the fuzz off.

I don’t think our tongues ever touched. He’d still be scraping the fuzz off if they had.

Remember kids: Once it’s on the internet, it’s forever.

So fucking smart.

So fucking smart.

Unless it’s this backpack. I can’t seem to find it anywhere.

Tiny paws, up the hill, suddenly you’re standing still,

Birdman

P.S. This was the final shot of the night and it is my favourite.

I sure do love that girl.

I sure do love that girl.

P.S.S You can donate to our Movember team like Niki Green just did by clicking here.

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