Jun 16

This Is F*ck*ng Exciting! For Me – Comedy Open Mic Round 18

For Change The Topic followers:

So as most of you know I have switched over to writing on https://www.steemit.com.

It’s a blogging platform on the Steem blockchain, and while I can’t get into the whole cryptocurrency discussion of it all, I can speak to the blogging aspect.

The main thing I like about it is that it has me creating again. Both Mrs. Birdman and I. We’re back to doing Therapy Thursdays again as well, and we are going to be doing them via video if anyone ever sends us their problems again.

Now, I know that not really writing anything for years has led to a complete lack of engagement on here, so I don’t expect that many are still following, but I do enjoy having things I write on here and have really enjoyed going back through old posts and reliving my not so distant youth.

There are some things I don’t even remember writing.

There are a lot of other great things about it, but getting rich is not one of them. I was under the impression that money flowed like wine from a soccer mom’s juice bottle, but I was misinformed.

It’s actually a cryptocurrency called Steem, and it flows more like me trying to poop after eating the whole cheese ball at Nana’s. Fuck off, it was full of Old Nippy and it was delicious.

Like I said, I don’t know anything about crypto. (That’s what we call cryptocurrency on Steemit. We’re all hip to the terms and shit.) I know that the price of crypto has been going down, so the value of my account has been going down as well. It was worth about $300 and it’s now worth about $150. I have also given a lot of my SBD away for contest prizes and stuff like that because I’m in this more for the long haul and I feel that positively impacting the platform where most of the creators are struggling to be seen, will help with longevity.

I’m not doing this to make a quick buck. I could throw a few handies out behind a gym if I was looking for that.

Hold on a sec. Did you catch that I implied that there were gays hanging out at gyms? That was just me throwing shade because I’m fat and pretending that I’m above going to a gym because of the gay guys that may or may not be there.

I’m not. It’s actually laziness that keeps me away from the gym. If we could guarantee to run into some decent gay guys, I’m sure Mrs. Birdman and I would both be there trying to lure them into our web. I mostly just want someone to explain some of the jokes on RuPaul’s Drag Race.

I get a kick out of that show, but there are some jokes where everyone is laughing, but I’m just sitting there, smiling, and waiting for the punchline.

Anyhow, the reason I’m so excited now is that there is a new plugin for my WordPress blog that will publish the post to Steemit without having @cheetahbot and @steemcleaners coming at you for plagiarising your own content. This is awesome because the interface in WordPress is way easier to use than writing code into Steemit.

It’s called SteemPress

This means I can publish on Change The Topic and simultaneously to my Steemit account. Apparently without a hitch. This post is a test, plus I figured I could use it as an entry for Comedy Open Mic as well.

So here are my nominations and a banner that was made by @matytan

I am nominating @kayyam09 and @cryptkeeper17 to join in the fun.

You can find out what you need to know about the contest here

They are a great bunch of fucking degenerates, and I know that they partly feel the same about me. (If you didn’t pick up on my subtlety, I was saying they think I’m a fucking degenerate.)

Anyhow, hope to see more of you around and check things out. You might just find a reason to get out of bed in the afternoon.

Dec 11

My Next Adventure

I’ve been thinking about writing a book for a long time now, but I’m quite lazy and become daunted by the thought of sitting down and writing a whole book at once.

So I figured that I would write it a chapter at a time on here. It would probably give me more incentive to actually do it, rather than drive around in a snowplow just thinking about for the next few months and forgetting about, like the rest of my great ideas.

Keep in mind that this will just be the rough draft, and that I am always open to constructive criticism, so if you see ways that I can improve, please let me know.

I’m on nights for the next month and a half, so this should help me use up some of my mornings that have been so far wasted on games and lounging.

If you find that you do enjoy the story, please subscribe to the blog so that you will get each chapter emailed to you. Then you don’t even have to click on the link or any other strenuous tasks.

Thanks,

Birdman

P.S. I also like to encourage sharing. It’s the selfish, narcissistic asshole in me.

Aug 30

Hey, Thanks A Bunch

(This is an almost exact replica of the post I put on Granola Light, but because some of the action comes from here, I thought it only fair to post one on Change The Topic too.)

I got a wonderful email today from Amazon.ca telling me that they had deposited a payment into our account. Wahoo!

As we’ve mentioned before, if you go through any Amazon link on this site and buy anything from Amazon within 24 hours of clicking through, we get a referral fee from Amazon.

You can learn more HERE.

Well, some of you have done this, and we just wanted to thank you for that.

It’s not going to make us rich or anything(unless we can get some of the sheep shagging crowd) , but if the monthly amounts keep going the way they have been, the money earned will be enough to pay the web hosting fees for the year.

That’s a nice savings, and it is appreciated. The way we look at it is that every little bit helps, and we don’t want to take anything for granted. I just wanted you to know that it means a lot to us, and the money is actually going somewhere that is really helping out.

So thank you. Thanks for clicking and putting a bit of dough back in our wallets, but most of all thanks for stopping by. We really love hearing from you, and because we are horrible at keeping in contact with our friends, this is generally the only way we do it.

Hopefully that doesn’t make us bad people, we just get caught up in life, and time gets away from us. It’s not that we don’t want to talk to anyone.

You understand, right Mom?

Anyhow, the soap, mealworms and the composting worms are doing fantastic, and the chickens are good too, but Red keeps laying eggs while roosting. I went out at about 5 AM and put her in a nesting box, and when I opened the coop at 7, she had a beautiful little egg that wasn’t smashed on the floor, so I will keep doing that until she learns, I guess.

We are also looking into black soldier fly larva, sprouting grains, and aquaponics for the future, so that’s pretty exciting. For me. I’m a real nerd when it comes to this stuff.

Birdman

Mar 23

I’m Trying Something New Again

wpid-mindofbirdman.jpg

I recently went to a friend’s site and clicked on his Amazon link to find a popup that asked if I wanted to shop at Amazon Canada. I thought that was pretty cool and I asked him how he got that to come up. He didn’t know what I was talking about, so I sent in a question to Amazon thinking it might be something to do with them.

It wasn’t, but the helpful fellow told me that it would be a specific code on the site from the hosting company or that he did himself. Seeing as he didn’t do it, I figured I would look up plugins for WordPress that dealt with it.

I came up with EasyAzon. It was $47. I hope it works like they say it will. I am going to try it out here, and if it works out well, I will also put it on our new site, Granola Light.

I think that I am actually going to try making money on the internet, and seeing as this blog has proven wildly unsuccessful at it, I might as well use it as my guinea pig. What have I got to lose, right?

The thing is, I need a little help.

I am going to post a few Amazon ads and I would really appreciate it if you could click on them and see if they take you to the Amazon of your respective country, then if you could either comment whether it worked on here, the Facebook page, G+, or Twitter, I would really appreciate it.

I’m trying to take the online course that came with it, but so far it is just teaching me how to create a site with the sole purpose of getting traffic to Amazon. While that sounds awesome,(not really), I would rather take a more organic approach and hope for a little trickle of business from Amazon.1)Although I have been toying with the idea of a very profane and snarky review site. Let me know if you think that would fly.

So anyhow, I am putting a few links up. Please let me know how it works. My fingers are crossed.

The first is an image link. You should be able to hover over it as well.

This is just a text link.

Game of Thrones: Season 1-5 dvd Bundle

And this is a CTA thingy?

I don’t know what I’m doing yet, but hopefully I will soon. I really like this kind of shit, and I’m hoping I can keep doing it, but I’m sure that one day I will have to go back to work. Between this, soap making, chickens, and the worms, I think I could have a pretty cool career.

Yes, I am counting my chickens before they are hatched. Figuratively and literally. I will get them after they are hatched and off the heat lamp.

Birdman

Awesome footnotes   [ + ]

1. Although I have been toying with the idea of a very profane and snarky review site. Let me know if you think that would fly.
Feb 25

Re-Publish Old Posts?

birdmandesk

I was just going through my posts, starting with the first and working my way up, to fix any errors, dead links, dead photos, or whatever I see fit. I was also putting ads in, because I’m poor. I mean really, why not? People buy shit from Amazon all the time. If they click on a link on this site, Amazon sends me a small chunk, and it doesn’t cost anyone anything extra.

Anyhow, I started reading these old posts and getting all nostalgic, when I came across one that ruffled some feathers. I had forgotten about this post, but when I read it again, I wanted to republish it. It’s one of those ones that I wouldn’t dare add any photos to. It’s not funny, and any photos would either diminish it, or rip a hole through my soul, for lack of a better word.

I started looking into republishing old posts, you know, to recycle content that some people might not see, or to post something to fill in the gaps. I just don’t know if it’s a good idea or not.

If I go through with it, what would be an acceptable amount of regurgitation? Once a week? I don’t want to make people hate me my self promoting doppelganger. Fucking attention whore.

I also applied for a job with the Canadian Census 2016 today. It seems like it would be alright, judging from the little flyer they put in the mail. It’s from early March to the end of July, so that’s pretty reasonable weather for banging on doors or whatever the job entails.

I’m also going to be selling some of my composting worms for bait. This is good, because that will help recoup some of the cost of getting them, and setting them up. I also hope to be able to build some flow through bins and sell some composting packages to locals as my red wiggler population grows. I really love these worms. They are so cool and hungry. I’d say they have tripled in population since I got them around August. They could be a blog on their own, really. A boring blog that nobody would read, but a blog nonetheless.

Anyhow, I guess I need to know if one old post a week would bother anyone, and if anyone has ever worked for the census and what it was like. Let me know in the comments or by whatever means you have available that would tickle your fancy.

Birdman