Slip Slidin’ Away

birdmandesk

So after a couple of peaceful days, I was starting to get calmed down. We let the dogs out before bed and then drifted off into a peaceful dreamland.

Until 11:40. That’s when Blue started pacing. I woke up instantly and ran him outside before he started pissing in the bedroom. After letting him back in, we got back into bed and drifted off again.

Until 12:45. That’s when the retching started. Luckily I caught it before there was enough saliva to soak through the [easyazon_link identifier=”B00Q7OB4EE” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]sheet[/easyazon_link] into the [easyazon_link identifier=”B004LQ1RJ2″ locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]mattress[/easyazon_link]. I ran him outside and waited for a few minutes, in nothing but my [easyazon_link identifier=”B00ACIGNJW” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]underwear[/easyazon_link], until he was whining to get back in. I figured that I would put him on the couch, as we just got new bedding that day, and didn’t want it soaked with puke.

As I was walking back to the bedroom I heard the retching again and bolted for the living room to see him with his back arched and mouth wide open. I called for him to come, but he was indisposed, so I picked him up and started running for the hall with him convulsing against my chest.

I thought I was home free until my feet shot out from underneath me and I went backwards, bouncing my head off of the [easyazon_link identifier=”B00TD0N6EU” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]maple[/easyazon_link] [easyazon_link identifier=”B0042K14EA” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]dresser[/easyazon_link] that the [easyazon_link identifier=”B00V0923TG” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]TV[/easyazon_link] sits on as the dog flew forward down the hall. When I came to, he had just finished upchucking what was left in the middle of the floor. I got up and slipped again falling in front of the door with Dover barking behind it. I think he smelled all of the food on the other side, but was upset that he couldn’t eat it. I let Blue outside and started cleaning the walls and floor with a [easyazon_link identifier=”B002S52ZKS” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]bath towel[/easyazon_link] that was in the [easyazon_link identifier=”B0041RRPII” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]dirty clothes[/easyazon_link]. I went outside and shook the moist [easyazon_link identifier=”B008RKA690″ locale=”CA” tag=”chathetop0f-20″]kibble[/easyazon_link] out off the deck and went back to get the [easyazon_link identifier=”B00FF5J0G0″ locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]cleaner[/easyazon_link] and some [easyazon_link identifier=”B00BGN8PLG” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]paper towels[/easyazon_link] to get the rest of the grossness off of everything. After twenty minutes of scrubbing with a splitting headache and what I thought was a broken foot, I let Blue back in and went to the shower to get the mashed nuggets and drying grasses out of my hair and skin.

I crawled into bed at 1:15 to a sleeping wife, who woke up and asked why I showered again. I started to explain, but she was quickly out like a light.

Fast forward to about 7:45 when I heard a shriek. “DOVER PEED ON MY [easyazon_link identifier=”B00746W9F2″ locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]IPAD[/easyazon_link].”

It figures. Par for the course. Needless to say, I was at the lady’s house where I got Dover’s [easyazon_link identifier=”B00D6XQEAI” locale=”US” tag=”granligh-20″]kennel[/easyazon_link] and bought the bigger one for Blue. They will be learning to enjoy sleeping next to each other in the living room from now on.

Birdman

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4 thoughts on “Slip Slidin’ Away

  1. You never fail to make me laugh. And that my friend is the greatest gift. 🙂 

    Sent from my Bell Samsung device over Canada’s largest network.

    • I am so pleased that I could gift you such joy. You once gave me a wonderful gift, and like a fool I lost it. Would you be able to give me the link to that beautiful Story Corps video about the man who loved his wife so much? I have been trying to find it again, but couldn’t remember the post or the name.

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