Well, hopefully by the time most of you are reading this, Abner and I will be heading out on the greatest adventure known to man. Well, it maybe isn’t as grand as all that, but if I hadn’t got the new snow tires put on the Green Goblin, it would be pretty sketchy in spots. I know that you’re wondering what the Green Goblin is, and I’ll tell you. It’s a 1999 green Honda Civic, with all the bells and whistles. By all, I mean three, and by bells and whistles, I mean working brakes; so watch out for oncoming traffic at high speeds Abner, she pulls a bit to the left when you put the binders on. I know that Green Goblin isn’t a really good nickname for a Civic, but Grocerygetter, Grannymobile and Babyshitster don’t sound all that cool, so I’m trying a different approach. I just got back from Crappy Tire, and of course the dirty rotters found something wrong, a wheel bearing has a bit of play. I called my buddy that’s a mechanic to see if she’s ready for float, and he says go for it. He mentioned something about me holding on a second, while he licked two papers together (must be scrapbooking lingo???) and said that he drove three weeks with a bearing gone in his truck. He didn’t seem worried, so I guess I won’t be either.
We did Christmas photos tonight, and a few fun ones. I like having a bunch of pictures to flip through, while I’m sitting out in camp. Makes a guy feel like he’s working for something, and not just working to work. I’m going to miss these girls so much while I’m gone, but at least I know they’ll be here when I get back, and they’re going to miss me too. T made me a going away present, and when she gave it to me, I almost started bawling. She explained the whole picture to me, as she was giving it to me. It was extremely detailed, right down to our tears as she clung onto my foot yelling “I dont want you to go Chris!!!!!!!!!!!!” and me yelling to the sky “I don’t want to go too!”. Jesus, this kid is breaking my heart. Okay, the punctuation and grammar have a couple mistakes, but she’s eight, I can give her a break on that. It’s not just her, The other two are just as bad. I get so I can barely look O in the face, without her big eyes making me want to sob like a kid who just dropped his ice cream and their mother crushes my soul with her veiled attempt at a smile, when I know she feels the same way I do. Well, except I have to leave all three of them, and she still gets to keep the two. I guess they are her daughters, and it would be frowned upon if I took them, but man, when things are really busy out there, I could get them working as campies on a two for one deal.
I know that tomorrow morning is going to be rough, but I hope I don’t break down in front of the school, wailing about not wanting to leave, and for them to just hug me one more time before my spirit dies. Those teachers are already wondering about me, since the time Mrs. Birdman sent me to pick them up and didn’t mention to the school that I was their stepfather and to put me on the list of approved people. That wouldn’t look too shady, some dude just shows up in a greasy green Honda and tells them he’s there to pick up a seven and a nine year old girl from school, explaining that their mother must have just forgot to tell them she was shacked up with him. Yeah, they started to surround me, asking for ID and closing the doors until I got Mrs. B on the phone to corroborate. I’m glad they did that, as creepy as it made me look and feel, that’s better than the alternative. Needless to say, I was put on the list shortly thereafter and everything has been hunky-dory since.
There is something magical about having people truly love you, and anyone who takes advantage of that, or even takes it for granted, needs to be kicked in whatever genitals they have. There are too many people to count, who long for that feeling and never receive it, yet there are some who throw it away without a moments notice. That’s just a waste of love. I hope these girls never give out an ounce of their love on someone who doesn’t deserve it. I’m sure they will, everyone does, but I really hope that they are smarter than the rest of us. They have such big hearts, and open minds, and I feel very sorry for the person who tries to manipulate that. I guess it’s been over the past year or so, that I’ve grown more sympathetic towards people who use a person’s good nature against them. It took me a long time to realize it, but they are just sad people, trying to be someone they aren’t. They obviously don’t have the capacity to love, because if they did, they wouldn’t use someone elses love against them. Don’t get me wrong; you mess with my family and I won’t be sitting down for long, but I do feel sorry for people like that. It took these three beautiful ladies in my life, for me to realize how much love a person can feel, and I’m not even maxed out yet. I don’t know if I ever will be, really. I’ve never felt this free, open and loved before, and every time I think it can’t get better, it does. So, Mrs. Birdman, love of my life, I thank you for showing me this world of joy that I have now, and know that every night, as I snuggle into my nice soft blanket that you sent with me, I will be thinking of you, and cherishing what you’ve given to me.
Cause a month on the road and I’ll be eatin’ from your hand,
P.S. When I said I wasn’t maxed out on love, I really meant that there was room for a threesome; you just have to convince Mrs. B.