Malibu, Vegas, and Arizona.

mindofbirdman

After we finished the first part of our day, we toured down Sunset Blvd. to the coast and then headed up to Malibu. A delicious feed of Jack In The Box and a brisk walk on the pier got us thinking that we should drive to the other side and see Point Dume.

It's just like in movies. Except there wasn't people lining the sides with fishing rods.

It’s just like in movies. Except there wasn’t people lining the sides with fishing rods.

There were a few people fishing at the end, and I was surprised to hear that they catch sharks and halibut off of the pier when they’re in season. They were just catching perch when we were there, so not worth renting rods and all that.

To me if there isn't ice on the shore, it's warm enough for a swim or a quick wash.

To me if there isn’t ice on the shore, it’s warm enough for a swim or a quick wash.

The hotty in the gift shop on the left gave me a brief history of Malibu. Something about a tile factory. She was soft looking and pretty.

The girl in the gift shop on the left gave me a brief history of Malibu. Something about a tile factory. She was soft looking and pretty.

He even did an army roll.

He even did an army roll.

Point Dume State Beach. It was less windy so Mrs. B wanted to sit in the sand.

Point Dume State Beach. It was less windy so Mrs. B wanted to sit in the sand.

Anyone know what kind of seaweed this is?

Anyone know what kind of seaweed this is?

Kept waiting for a red bathing suit. Never happened.

I kept waiting for a red bathing suit. It never happened.

I guess that's Point Dume. We weren't in a rock climbing frame of mind.

I guess that’s Point Dume. We weren’t in a rock climbing frame of mind.

So long, ocean. Thanks for being too cold and saving us $200 in surf lessons.

So long, ocean. Thanks for being too cold and saving us $200 in surf lessons.

Now we were heading for Vegas. I’m not sure why, but we just decided to go to Vegas. Good thing too, a nice room at Bally’s was $90 cheaper than the Pasadena Inn, and we got a steak dinner for $7.99. I’d say it was worth the extra $60 in gas to get there. It was uneventful, except for this crazy lowrider truck.

You can’t see it in the video, but it had a bunch of little chunks out of the bottom of the back.

I would love to know where this truck is practical. Surely not a construction zone. Anyhow, here’s a picture on the way to Barstow, where I had a monster dump and we squatted on McDonald’s wifi for a bit.

Now on to Vegas.

Now on to Vegas.

We actually didn’t take any pictures in Vegas, so I’ll just tell you that we did what we had to do, ate dinner, and did what we had to do again. I think. We put $5 in a machine at the restaurant, but forgot to invest the rest of the $20 we had agreed to part ways with. I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.

We got up in the morning and hit a fancy box mall where I lost my wife and almost called the cops, but it turned out the Old Navy employees were just lazy and didn’t know who the fuck was even in their store. Assholes.

I dropped her off and went to get gas, because she wanted a sweater as it was a bit cool, and she wouldn’t cover up with the chunk of tarp I found in the ditch just north of Hesperia. I told her I’d cut it into a poncho for her, but nooooo, little Miss Snootypants can’t wear homemade clothes that you tie on with a piece of rubber door gasket. I guess she’s too good for that.

Anyhow I came back in ten minutes and went in to let her know that I was back and she was nowhere to be seen. I decided to rid myself of the abundance of red meat in my system, and when I was done, I checked again. Nothing. I decided to check the H&M across the street, but she wasn’t there either. I went back into Old Navy and got one of the girls to walk around and check with me. I took one side and she took the other.

Nothing.

She then told me that there hadn’t been anyone of that description in the store.

Oh shit. Scenario after scenario went through my head. I started going store to store, asking everyone walking by if they’d seen her. They hadn’t. I went back to the car and tried to figure out how to get hold of her. I had the only American phone, as ours were shut off and in our luggage. We got a pay as you go card for an old Blackberry, because the roaming fees are phenomenal when you cross the border. As I was trying to figure out how to get the cops without calling 911, she came sauntering out to the car from Old Navy.

The simple asshole hadn’t checked the ladies change rooms. I thought that was the whole reason for getting her assistance and sending her to that side of the store. Apparently the reason they hadn’t seen her in the store is because they hadn’t left the front counter the whole time she had been in there. Dicks.

Anyhow, we left there with some jalapeno Cheetos and some lemon-lime Lays, and started towards our friends in Phoenix. We stopped and took these on the way. Hope you like them. They are pictures of desert.

This is desert

This is desert

This is also desert.

This is also desert.

This is desert as well.

This is desert as well.

I guess we are all caught up. Next stop is Phoenix, but that will have to be for Friday or something. Too many cool things to put them all into one post, but that’s okay. It gives me something to write about.

On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair, warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air,

Birdman

P.S. We got 1000 likes on the Facebook page, so don’t forget to comment on the Guardian Bell® giveaway post over there. The draw is tomorrow, so quit yer dawdlin’.

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2 thoughts on “Malibu, Vegas, and Arizona.

  1. Looks like an awesome vacation! I loved Phoenix when I was there. The desert was facinating to me!

    So glad you two had a great time!

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