I say “sort of lucky”, instead of “sort of unlucky”, because I’m a “glass is half full” kind of guy and I’m lucky in the things that matter.
Take for instance, my marriage. It’s pretty fucking superb. Sure, I got laid off today, but I came home to a big hug and a firm “Don’t worry, it will be fine.”
It’s pretty hard to top that in my book. She’s the best partner in life that anyone could ever want. When I’m feeling down, she’s there. When I’m feeling up, she’s there too. She’s my balance, my light, and my safe harbour. I never have to worry about shit when I’m with her.
In my past I’ve been with people who would automatically freak out if my hours got cut in a slow period. I mean lose it to the point of crying and not being able to sleep, even though I was still working fifty plus hours a week. It was just a bad reaction to change.
It gave me pretty bad anxiety, but I’m all good now. 🙂
Oh yeah, I got laid off. Kind of sucky, but I knew it was coming eventually, and it lasted longer than it was supposed to, so I’m pretty happy about that. I really enjoyed that job, even though I had to physically work harder than I have in twenty years or so. I was learning new things every day, and I got to meet a shitwhack of excellent people. The salt of the earth, if you will. I also have a recall date for next spring if I don’t have a job by then.
I fucking well better have a job by then.
Even if I have to work odd jobs all summer, and head back to the patch for a few rounds this winter, I’m pretty sure that I’ll be doing something.
I was sort of contemplating doing snow removal this winter*, because I have a plow for the four wheeler and I’m picking up a snowblower for the tractor.They both have cabs for them, so it seems like the biggest part of the company is already started. I suppose I’ll have to register something and do a bit of door knocking to get the word out, but hey, I’ve got nothing but time now.
Whether I’ll have any time in the winter is another story.
* Give me a dingle if you’re in the Colborne area and need your driveway done this year.
These are just things I keep mulling over. Lucky for me, I have choices and possibilities. A lot of folks don’t get that luxury. I couldn’t imagine being stuck in a life that I loathe, just so I can exist on a molecular level. I know that there is always the hope that things will get better, but man, if I had lived my 42 years simply to keep breathing and working a job I hate, I don’t think I would have bothered.
Another way that I’m extremely lucky is my friends and family. They’re top notch, AAA people that I sincerely love to be around. I wish I had my own company with a big enough payroll to hire them all, but that’s a bit crazy. I mean, think about it. Who the fuck is going to pay us all to hang around the board room, playing absinthe pong, shuffleboard, and seeing who is the best at axe throwing? (I bet it’s Stanley)
Nobody. That’s who. Unless there was some rich moron that just wanted to laugh all the time and go to fun parties, but didn’t want to take the time and effort that you would need to make your own friends to party with. I suppose that if such a person existed, they would gladly pay us our fee, because we are the funniest, most fun loving bunch that you shall ever cross paths with. It’s pretty nice that I can sit with any random assortment of my pals, and have an absolutely great time. I think that’s pretty rare. I feel like I won a life lottery or something.
Could you imagine being miserable all the time. How draining is that? I remember when I was younger, I thought that good things should just fall into my lap. When they didn’t, I was visibly upset. I couldn’t understand why people didn’t see how great I was, and why they weren’t just offering me a fabulous life. To counter-attack, I would do a minimal amount of work, because in my opinion, I was getting a minimal amount of money. I kept asking myself: Why did they all have to be such assholes? Don’t they know that I am destined for greatness?
Apparently they didn’t.
That was when I decided that I needed to change my work ethic. I noticed that when I was doing something I enjoyed, I would try harder to do a good job, to get better at it. This in turn, rewarded me by getting me raises, bonuses, and other fringe benefits. That made me want to work harder,.
You see the cycle here?
It took me a long time, but I figured out that you need to do jobs that interest you. If you don’t, you’ll be hating it within a month, and sabotaging yourself within six. That’s not fair to you, and it’s not fair to whoever hired you.
I’m not saying you have to absolutely love your job, but you need to be interested in it.
Anyhow, enough droning from me. Sorry that all of this didn’t end up with a point, but what can you do?
She’s got an alligator bag, top hat to match, dressed in black on black,