Dear TT: How do you tell someone nicely that they are being a whiny ass? I really couldn’t give a shit if this person remains in my life, but because of mutual friends, that they are family with, I feel like I need to keep the peace. However, for this to happen, I would like to address the fact that they are a huge douchecanoe, and hopefully help them become tolerable.
Not perfect – But close!
Dear Not Perfect: I would just let them have it. They really do need to know. It’s better if you can push them down on the ground first, just for intimidation sake. You then stand over them and kick them while you yell completely insane shit that no one else can understand. It can’t make any sense at all, kind of like religion, and then when you feel redeemed and that they have taken enough abuse, you pretend to snap out of it and come to your senses. You say that the Lord just came into your heart,and told you to quit hurting that person. You then reach down to help them up and whisper to them “If you ever whine again, I will cut your fucking heart out and eat it.” Continue reading