Mr. Brady and I took his boys up to the camp for the weekend and had a great time. Unfortunately on a boy’s weekend, the old adage, What happens at the cabin, stays at the cabin, takes precedence over anything I’d like to tell you, so that’s that.
I wanted to tell you all about how it was the first time on a boy’s weekend that I was the (mainly) responsible adult, and how oddly natural it felt to be in that role, but that’s about as far as I can go on the subject. It’s sad, really, because I think it would have made for a great blog post, what with me forgetting just about everything important, but I can’t write it, so without further ado I’m going to tell you about The Watch.
Mrs. B and I settled in to watch this movie last Thursday, but because of intense laziness on my part, I didn’t write it up for Fox Friday. (still not sure if I can legally use that)
Seeing as Fridays are usually a crapshoot for me anyhow, I was hoping to be able to have a movie or TV show to review every Friday, thus preventing me from using lack of creativity or writer’s block as an excuse for not having a post. By the time I get finished Therapy Thursday, (Please send something in), I am often drained, so a movie review would be a perfect, easy, mindless post to finish out the week.
I guess not easy enough, because I laid on the bed, talking to my beautiful, smart, and charming wife until I was too tired to write, then I just crawled under the covers to catch a few hours sleep. I set my alarm for 5 AM, and made a plan to get up and write it early, so that it would be on there for Friday morning.
It was going to be easy to do, mostly because we really enjoyed the movie, but also because I knew exactly what I wanted to say. I use knew in the past tense, because for several reasons, I didn’t get to sit down and write until right now, which is Sunday night. I’m not saying that boy’s weekend had any effect on my thought process, but I just can’t remember all of those choice things that I wanted to say about this particular film.
I was probably going to start out by telling you how funny it was, even though it was cheesy. It actually might have been funnier, because it was cheesy. The comedy part of the movie was great, and other than Jonah Hill not being as funny he usually is, the movie was still one of the funniest ones that I’ve seen in a long time. It wasn’t that he didn’t make me laugh, because he did, a little. It was just that he wasn’t as good as an intense character. I’m used to seeing him in a neurotic, nervous, affable kind of guy, and this character just didn’t suit him in my mind. The rest of the guys were fabulous, and I think my favourite was Richard Ayoade as Jamarcus. I had honestly never even heard of this guy before I got sent the giveaway promo pack from Fox, but he really stood out. Don’t get me wrong, Vince Vaughn as the worried, fun dad, and Ben Stiller as the perpetual club starter, were great, but you go into a movie expecting that. When the unknown guy keeps up with, and sometimes surpasses their brilliance, you take notice.
Without spoiling anything, there are some action scenes that I thought were just okay, but I think the mix of them with the funny bits was a perfect blend. Even Mrs. Birdman loved it, and she’s not a fan of the action/suspense sequences at all. It was just a really fun, hour and a half of enjoyment for both of us.
Another thing that I should mention is that R. Lee Ermey pops up in this, and is entertaining as hell. I fucking love that guy. I think he had my favourite quote from the movie with: “Why don’t you just shut your cocksucker there, dickweed?”
I know, right? That guy is pure gold as an ornery, belligerent old man. He just curses so well, it should be mandatory to have him in every movie.
Maybe something like:
R. Lee Ermey in The Muppet Movie:
“Hey there, you puke coloured, spindly legged motherfucker. Why don’t you grab that painted, fucking pig whore of yours and go for a fucking bike ride in the park? You fucking pansy.”
R. Lee Ermey in Home Alone:
“Oh, you’re gonna try and hit me in the face with a fucking paint can, you little turd sucking maggot? Now I’m going to kick your little babymaker right up into your throat. How would you like that, Nancy?”
You get the picture, right? The guy is a swearing legend, and I doff my cap to him in respect. I can only hope to be half the swearer that he is by the time I’m his age, but I will keep trying. Until the Jehovah’s actually get me to convert, anyhow.
So, lots of sexual shit, cursing, and some crazy action, make for a fantastic waste of time for me and the missus. If you love laughing, then you should get out there and get this movie.
That’s how it goes, cause part of me knows what you’re thinkin’,
P.S. Get your Therapy Thursday questions in if you have any. We are thinking of doing a Therapy Thursday podcast, but need to get a bunch together so we can record them.
Now, because it contains “Birdmen” in it, here’s another little nugget of bonus promotional wisdom:
Silly, Real-Life Clubs
Catch the All-Star Squad in This Sci-fi Comedy Available on Blu-ray and DVD November 13
Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Jonah Hill and Richard Ayoade take male bonding to hilarious new heights in this outrageous, no-holds-barred comedy that gets funnier every time you watch! There’s trouble brewing in peaceful Glenview, Ohio. That’s why four civic-minded citizens, armed with flashlights, walkie-talkies and spiffy new jackets, have teamed up to safeguard their community. But the guys find more than they bargained for when they uncover an alien plot to destroy Earth, and now these bumbling heroes are Glenview’s only chance to save the neighborhood — and the world — from annihilation.
From secret societies to Neighborhood Watch groups – Here’s a breakdown of some of the most exclusive, offbeat and just plain weird clubs:
Society for Explosives Engineers
This society strives to educate students about careers in mining, specifically mining through use of explosives. There are lots of field tests and explosions involved in the education process.
The Beefsteak Club
This 300 year old British club was also known as the Sublime Society of Beefsteak. Their membership caps off at 24; even the Prince of Wales, the future George IV, had to wait until someone died to become a member. Members gather to eat steak, talk about steak, sing about steak and even wear a funny outfit including a badge proclaiming “Beef and Liberty”.
National Toothpick Holder Collectors’ Society
This 700 member society promotes and supports the collecting of toothpick holders, and does research and articles for their publication the Toothpick Bulletin and participates in collector-related events.
The Quiet Birdmen is a secretive drinking club for pilots known for their boisterous gatherings. Members, called QBs, must be invited to join, and they join for life. Today, the club’s membership, organized into regional “hangars”, is made up primarily of retired airline and military pilots, as well as a few astronauts.
World Association of Ugly People
This club was founded in Italy in 1879 and an organization dedicated to fighting for the recognition of ugly people, in a society that places a high value on physical beauty. The group’s motto is “A person is what he is and not what he looks like”.
Originally started by Italian noblemen and formerly a marriage agency, the club seeks to protect aesthetic biodiversity and combat the media’s portrayal of beauty.
The Ejection Tie Club
To join this club, you’ll have to have survived being fired out of a military plane by ejection seat. Totally safe, totally normal…and your prize for such a dangerous feat is a special tie you can wear so you can recognize your fellow ejects. Exciting times!